Adam

Of Hebrew origin. Translates to "He who deflowered Eve."

Ann

Originally a one-syllable abbreviation for "Anne," Ann grew in popularity after the letter e was discovered in "devil," much to the devil's surprise.

Benjamin

Long for "Ben," Benjamin gained acceptance after the death of Benjamin Franklin, the man who accidentally discovered kites.

Britney

Though primarily associated with the recently famous pop singer Britney Spears, Britney actually dates back to 1982, when she was born.

Christian

Of biblical origin, as in "Wow, look at all those Christians!" and "Hello, my name is Christian."

Cripple

What better way to protect your potentially disabled child from the ridicule of his peers? He can't take offense, because they're just calling his name.

Dawson

British for "elevator," Dawson is undergoing a resurgence due to the popular television character Freddie (Boom Boom) Washington.

Erstwhile

Spanish, as in "mi nombre es Erstwhile."

Flash

Great for a short-lived, explosive child. "He came and went in a flash," the epitaph will read, "and he had a very unusual name."

Glaucoma

More of an eye disease than a name befitting a child, Glaucoma strikes millions of Americans every year.

Hickory

"Hickory dickory dock the mouse ran up the clock the clock struck one the mouse ran down hickory dickory dock."

Did you catch the reference?

Hoop

Hoop would make a strange name for any child.

Klaus von Klitzing

English, meaning "claws of the klitzing."

Larry (Lawrence)

Origin unknown.

Lesbian

Of Greek origin, meaning "from the island of lesbians."

Mentos

Italian, meaning "The Fresh Maker."

Mordechai

Very ethnic. Very chic. Very Mordechai.

Neiman-Marcus

"Any parents naming their children Neiman-Marcus will receive a $75 gift certificate to our store, redeemable for up to one year beyond the date of birth." - Neiman-Marcus catalog

That's a lot of money, folks. Think about it.

Oh

Possible nicknames: "hhh," "<silence>."

Rapist

Not to be confused with a type of violent criminal, Rapist would make a great name for your child.

Retardo

A Spanish retard.

Sweatshop

Although some parents may object to using their children as walking political statements, these are the same parents who put leashes on their babies and send their dogs to college.

Trendy

There's nothing more Trendy than a child. Anybody who says otherwise has obviously never met your son.

Uglirific

OK, I admit it - this is just one I made up because I thought it was funny. Sorry about that.

Vat

A nickname for Victoria, Vat has earned increasing street cred as a result of Canada's Value Added Tax initiative.

Whoops

Though less common since the advent of reliable contraception, Whoops is still fairly popular for purely aesthetic reasons.

Xenophobia

Xenophobia is a powerful human phenomenon that deserves wide-spread attention. Wouldn't you say the same of your child?

Yogurt

The first goats and sheep were domesticated in Mesopotamia around 5000 BC. But only in the last several decades has their product become popular in this country, thanks to its convenience, texture, and taste.

Zebrew

If you're Jewish and your baby is a zebra, why not make the best of an admittedly difficult situation?