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Executive Decisions

What would Bush and Gore do if their wife Kitty were raped and murdered? We have their responses to the trickiest questions.

The Delegate Rorschach Test

Armed with caption-less political cartoons, MH operatives in L.A. and Philadelphia begged delegates for punchlines. Many shooed us away, but some gave us blank stares. See what the rest said.

Al Gore's Speech: An advance look

Will he dumb it down or wonk it up? How many times will he mention Tennessee? His wife with the funny name? His VP's wife with that other kind of funny name? We have the answers to these and very few other questions in our sneak preview of the biggest moment in Al Gore's political life since using the Mr. President aftershave that one time.

George W's Diary: The L.A. entry

George W responds to the donkey convention with poignant illustrations and satisfactory cursive.
Also: See the Philly entries.

Adhere This: Our Democratic campaign stickers

Al Gore only wishes he could come up with slogans as good as these—although he would like them to be slightly less offensive. Check out our stickers, then buy them at our store.

1600 Pennsisraelnia Avhebrew: The Jewish White House

By now you are probably aware that Joseph Lieberman does not regularly attend mass. But did you know that America has a long tradition of such leaders? You should.

The Manchurian Candidate: Is Gore playing with a full deck?

Thirty years ago in Vietnam, Al Gore was captured by the Chinese. In an underground jungle laboratory, his mind was erased and reconfigured, transforming the idealistic son of a U.S. Senator into a single-minded puppet, programmed to one day reach the White House. Today, his every move is manipulated using an ordinary deck of playing cards.

Crashing the Party

All this week the Democrats are having parties with silly names. Mardi Gras Goes Hollywood, anyone? Take our quiz and see if you can distinguish a real political gathering from a fake one.

Delegates' Guide to LA 2000

Your official guide to making the most of the big show. Features a welcome letter from Steven Spielberg, a map of what's where in the Staples Center (to reach the Abortion on Demand Café, turn left at the Buddhist monk skybox), and a list of the few convention moments worth leaving the Viper Room for.

Gore Without an Editor

The New Yorker recently ran an insightful profile of Vice President Al Gore. However, as that publication is prone to mistakes, it published the wrong version. Here is the correct one.

Sorry You Were Passed Over
Al Gore's cards to his VP hopefuls

Jockeying for the VP Nod

Gore's best bets

Speak Shrilly, and Wave an Inflatable Stick
Deep in the heart of the Texas delegation

Al Gore's Secret Constituency
The stump speech

Al Gore's Prettiest Pig
Swine makeover by the Vice President

New: The Library of Accolades
The Dreamworks Conundrum
Destination: Chappaqua
The Secret of the 19th Hole

The Quest for the Nobel Prize

Billions of blue blistering barnacles! Clintin, everyone's favorite Belgian cartoon character, leaves the White House and embarks on a new series of adventures.

"The timing of this absolutely stinks to high heaven," said White House spokesman Jake Siewert, and for a minute we could have sworn he was referring not to the latest grand jury probe of Bill Clinton but to Tipper Gore’s pre-speech dance routine. (More...)

New: Dear Ramon
Dear Harry
Dear Terry McAuliffe
Dear Cher

Much of politics can be reduced to writing charming thank you notes to people who kiss your ass so they'll keep doing it. Watch senate-hopeful Hillary Clinton put the attitude in gratitude.

As heard on NPR:

The 2000 Demmy Awards!
Bette Midler presents the Demmy for best supporting candidate

GOP Convention 2000: The Other Half of the Story
Featuring George W's campaign diary, corporate memos on the death penalty, an analysis of Congressman Kolbe's secret gay code, postcards from Alan Keyes and much much more.

Reform Party Convention
See our exclusive coverage of last weekend in Long Beach.

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